Truth is Stranger than Fiction

Some of the comments and questions left after my last blog were questioning the truth and reality of the events which always seem to happen in our lives’.  Unfortunately, neither I nor anyone else is creative enough to concoct these stories!!!  Fortunately however, I am strong enough to live through these events and still talk about them. 

Believe me, it’s ALL true.  The kids read each blog before I publish and usually add the things that I have subconsciously repressed.  Dwynn won’t read them because he becomes nauseous from the vivid memories and develops headaches from flashing dollar signs.  Friends can attest that they have lived through these events with us, unknowing what our karma will bring tomorrow.

Another question is, “given your track record, does it scare you just getting up in the morning?”  You bettcha!   We tell the kids all the time to do exactly opposite of what we do and they should all lead happy, safe, and successful lives.  

In this last blog about the camper, I didn't even write about the time Chloe and I had planned a weekend camping trip in the mountains.   While driving up a steep rocky incline, dodging large potholes, I ran over a boulder.  Thrilled that Dwynn wasn’t with us, Chloe and I got out of the truck to survey the new damage.  Not seeing anything, we were shocked at our new unfounded luck.  We continued on our way, arrived and set up camp smiling.

Chloe connected the water hose, sewage pipe and electric while I opened the awning and hung my cherished Chinese multi-colored lantern tchotchke lights.  After eating shish kabob for dinner and watching the sunset during our campfire, we decided to get ready for bed.  I got undressed and turned on the water for my shower.  The water pressure wasn’t very strong but that was OK.  As I was trying to rinse the shampoo from my hair in the trickle, Chloe came running in half-screaming, half-laughing.  At that instant, the shower flooring started to creak and wiggle.  All soapy, I jumped out of the shower as the whole plumbing system crashed to the ground with high pressured water spraying everywhere.   Needless to say, we became pretty famous at this campground as well!  

I also didn’t write about our end 0f the year Girl Scout Troop camp outing to an amusement park in Idaho.  Everything was great until it came time to pack-up the camper and leave.  We disconnected the electric and began to drain the sewage.  As we were flushing all the tanks, we noticed the black holding tank was plugged.  For you folks who don’t know, the grey holding tank is for the sinks and shower and the black holding tank is for the toilet.  While I was in the lodge restroom washing dishes, the girls thought that adding a large amount of water would unclog the drainage hose.  We realized too late that the cap had mistakenly been left on the hose when it was initially placed in the drain.  I arrived just in time to see the sewage hose bulging and BULGING.  All of us were scrambling backward when it exploded with 15 girl’s worth of …. in it! 

When the tube burst, it started spraying and dancing all through the air.  While still spraying I frantically disconnected the main tube from the camper and told all the screaming girls to hurry up and squish in the car so we could immediately leave.  Covered in sweat, I pulled away nonchalantly.  We heard someone honking and yelling to me that I had left our RV steps down by mistake.  I calmly said thank you and hurriedly got out, lifted the steps and got back into the truck.  Believe it or not, the hose was still spraying!   As I drove a bit further, another car was honking at me.  Feeling discovered for sure this time, I got out and the fellow camper told me that I forgot to lower our sky lights.  I calmly said thank you and again rushed back into the truck.  As we approached the front campground gate one of the girls was feeling sick and needed to use the restroom.  I parked my rig and again nonchalantly went in with her.  Surrounding the sink area were women gossiping about “the camper who’s …. had just exploded all over the park.”  I had to sound shocked!

AND BELIEVE ME THIS IS JUST THE TIP OF THE ICE BURG!!!  TUNE IN FOR MY NEXT BLOG... AND TELL YOUR FRIENDS...  PLEASE.

A favorite recipe that I always make with my Girl Scouts when camping is a Gourmet Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich.  Even the “picky eaters” eat this one!

Gourmet Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich

1 Loaf of Texas Toast Bread

Fresh Sliced Strawberries

1 jar of Strawberry Preserves

1 8ounce package of Cream Cheese

1 can of Dry Roasted Peanuts

1 jar of Crunchy Peanut Butter

For each sandwich, spread one slice of bread with the preserves, one slice with the peanut butter and one slice with cream cheese.  Layer sliced strawberries over the preserves.  Sprinkle peanuts over the peanut butter.  Arrange sandwich first with peanut butter slice facing up, then cream cheese slice facing down and then strawberry slice facing down.  Gently grill or toast each sandwich until lightly brown and filling is warm.  YUM!!!   

Happy Camper Anniversary

I've had a really hectic summer and now I'm back!  My main focus will be writing on this blog.

Keep the comments coming and spread the word!

Thanks, Aimee

Our Camper Anniversary

How it All Began

As of today we have lived in the camper for one year!  Last summer we had no idea that we’d be in this fifth wheel for so long.  We’re still unsure how long it will be until we complete the home we have yet to even start.  Hopefully there won’t be too many more anniversaries!  Last night sitting around our campfire we started reminiscing about “The Camper Curse.”  Truth is always stranger than fiction.    

For many years we've wanted to purchase a “toy.”  Living in San Diego, EVERYONE has toys.  Knowing that I love the beach, Dwynn loves fishing and we all enjoy camping, except when it rains, we figured that a camper was the perfect solution.  After researching Class A motor homes, trailers and pop-ups, we decided on a fifth wheel.  Dwynn needed a new vehicle anyway so we figured we’d kill two birds with one stone and buy a dually Dodge pick-up at the same time as the RV.  Both were delivered to our home on the Thursday afternoon before the last day of school, prior to summer break.  

When the delivery date was confirmed, I made reservations at a special RV campground that bordered the Arizona - California state line.  What a GREAT way for the family to kick-off summer vacation!  On Friday, the four kids would arrive home from school and Dwynn from work, then off we’d go.  Chloe and I went shopping to furnish the camper with cutlery, dishware, bedding, and gourmet food.  After the camper was totally bedecked on Thursday night, Dwynn and Alex began hitching the fifth wheel into the bed of the truck.  Chloe was asleep and Bryce and Russ were busy texting on the phone to friends about what pranks they could pull-off the next morning in school before summer dismissal.  

It was 11:30 pm when I heard the crash!  Dwynn and Alex were standing in the empty driveway with gaped mouths and arms flailing.  Dwynn was pacing back and forth saying words AL and I didn’t quite want to understand.  Having no light outside and no experience hitching the camper to the truck, it was done incorrectly, to say the least.  When they began their test drive, the camper came unhitched and smashed down on the truck bed.  The slope of the driveway caused both vehicles to roll into the street.  As the truck rolled, the brake system on the camper caused the RV and truck to stop abruptly blocking the whole road.  When Bryce and Russ came out, they found me with my mouth gaped and arms flailing. 

The camper is designed with a brake lock system that goes into effect when the connection between the camper and truck is broken.  Being that the truck separated from the camper, the brake system worked!  The brakes locked on the camper so well that even when the police arrived by chance at 2 am, they were unable to budge it from blocking the entire road.  Luckily during our purchase we became friendly with Stuart, our RV representative who had given me his business card with his home phone number on it.  Finally at 2:30 we were able to reach him.  He identified the specific replacement part we needed from their repair shop to move the RV.  Being unable to reach the company owner, Stuart and I were sent with good wishes from the friendly policeman to climb the fence and break-in to the dealership to steal the necessary piece.  I have to admit, it was a bit creepy being partnered in crime with this virtual stranger at four in the morning. 

As the sun began to rise, the salesman and I returned home to find the RV still in the middle of the road and the policeman chatting with Alex.  Now that it was dawn, it was easier to assess the damage that occurred to both vehicles.  We totaled the truck bed and had smashed the entire overhang of the fifth wheel!  Stuart was able to fix the brake system and re-hitch the camper so it could finally be moved.  In the driveway chatting over coffee and croissants, the policeman and Stuart decided there was no need to postpone our excursion since nothing could be fixed over the weekend anyway.  Being a bit apprehensive, we decided to forge ahead.   We could drop both things off on Monday to be repaired.  

Early Friday evening after everyone arrived home, we left on our first camping adventure.  At dusk we pulled off the highway to purchase some gasoline.  While Dwynn approached the turn towards the gas pump he under estimated the amount of space needed.  The kids and I all gritted our teeth as we heard the screeching and cracking down the entire length of the left side of the camper as it scraped the red metal post that protects the pump from patrons like us.  Unfortunately, that is also the side where our slide-out is!  Since everything was already smashed and bruised, including egos, and every passerby was already staring at us on the highway, we tenaciously persevered.  With paralytic slowness, Dwynn drove with no hesitation of brake slamming and causing family whiplash, we finally arrived at our destination at one am.

Under no circumstances were we going to unhitch the camper again until we were at the repair lot on Monday, so we prayed for a pull-through camping spot.  Not only was Dwynn unused to driving a dually truck but he had never pulled a 30 foot camper, let alone back one up.   Of course being this late, there were no pull-through spots available.  We kept circling and circling with our brights beaming waiting until some experienced disturbed soul came out of their camper to help us back-up.  After fifteen minutes three irritated intoxicated men drove up in a golf cart.  After giving them some beer and a good laugh, their contempt disappeared.  Actually we became quite famous at this campground as we were the main attraction.  Everyone had to come and see our smashed and dented brand new auto and RV.  As their disturbed faces twitched we could tell they were secretly pleased with their own mishaps.

As the morning hours advanced, so did the temperature.  By lunchtime the thermometer reached above 100 degrees. Neither the air conditioner nor refrigerator was working.  All six of us were on edge and fighting.  We were all thinking “how could we ever have thought that purchasing a broiling tin can to live in would be FUN?”  We left by three o’clock.  On Saturday evening we dropped off both the car and fifth wheel to be fixed in closed sale lots.  

Being that the accidents happened at separate times, even though it was within a day, we had to pay three deductibles!  The cost of this toy was quickly escalating.  After two weeks both things were repaired.  We picked up the truck from the body shop and then drove to the camper repair shop.  Dwynn and I both needed a serious lesson on the correct way to hitch.

Dwynn went first.  He backed the truck up and with the help of the repairman he was able to line things up and hitch correctly.  After repeating this three times, it was now my turn.  I slowly backed the truck up and the repairman told me to pull forward and readjust.  My window was open so I could hear his commands and blood-curdling scream.  I stopped immediately and was frozen with fear.  This poor boy continued to hold the tailgate of the truck with his right hand, while he asked me to drive forward. The metal hitch on the camper was hanging down and he severed three of his fingers.  He was lying on the ground writhing in pain holding his bloodied hand.  As he was being transported to the hospital, another repairman told us that just before our arrival, this boy had purchased a new Les Paul guitar system.  Even though we were assured that this accident was not my fault, I was in shock, trying not to throw-up and terrified to go near this cursed truck or camper!  The shop owner would still not allow us to leave until I had learned the correct way to hitch. 

After forty minutes we arrived home and washed all the blood from the new truck bed.  Reluctantly I went inside the camper to check everything and lock it up when unbelievably, I smelled smoke.  I noticed the back cupboard had flown open during the drive and my special any-strike matches stroked each other and ignited.  The exterior wall of the slide and the back wall were blackened with soot.  One chair had a burned splotch and a portion of the carpet had melted.  Thankfully, the fire extinguished itself.  Realizing that our two propane tanks are mounted just outside of the back wall, we felt extremely lucky there wasn’t a huge explosion.  Without cleaning, I shut and locked the door and wouldn’t re-enter for at least a month. 

Just think, if the camper had exploded we’d be homeless now. 

Happy Anniversary!   

For special occasions, such as our anniversary, I love to make this cake!  This recipe is from my college roommate.  When her mother would make this,I'd always make sure I'd get a piece. I didn’t know I liked carrot cake until I tasted this one. After you’ve tasted this recipe, you’ll be a REAL Carrot Cake Snob!    Thanks, Rosie

Carrot Cake

(Make 2 days ahead)

4 large eggs

1 ¼ cup Vegetable Oil

2 cups Flour

2 teaspoons Baking Soda

2 teaspoons Baking Powder

1 ½ teaspoon Salt

2 teaspoon Cinnamon

2 cups Sugar

1 can (8 1/3 ounce) crushed Pineapple, drained

2 cups packed shredded carrots (about 6)

3/4 cup Walnuts or Pecans, chopped coarsely  

Place eggs and oil in mixing bowl, blend well.  Combine flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt, cinnamon and sugar.  Add to mixing bowl.  Add pineapple, carrots and nuts.  Mix well.  Pour into greased 13X9 pan.  Bake at 350* for 35 minutes.  Cool completely for about 50 minutes on rack.  Ice with cream cheese frosting.  Refrigerate for 2 days before eating.

Cream Cheese Frosting

½ cup Butter or Margarine

1 – 8 ounce Cream Cheese, softened

1 teaspoon Vanilla

1 pound Confectioner Sugar

Cream margarine, cream cheese and vanilla, add sugar and beat well.  Frost, then sprinkle with nuts.  Cover and place in refrigerator for two days.